YOU’VE GOT LOCATIONS: A GUIDE TO ROMANCE MOVIES FILMED IN NYC

Set the scene. Valentine’s Day has passed and you just watched all of your favorite Meg Ryan romances. From Sleepless in Seattle to You’ve Got Mail, you’re considering dropping everything to become a writer in hopes that your very own Tom Hanks will find you.

While the chances of that happening are slim, reenacting your favorite movie scenes in the places they were shot may fare a better chance. If you’re a vina living in New York City, you share the same home as just about every romantic film you can think of. So why not go live out your own romance for yourself?

You’ve Got Mail (1998)

Courtesy of IMDB.

Starring Meg Ryan as Kathleen Kelly and Tom Hanks as Joe Fox, this film fixated on a 90s version of Tinder is a classic. Shot almost entirely on the Upper West Side, New York vinas can visit the small bookshop Kathleen owned, which is now a cleaners, to the cafe where Kathleen nearly got stood-up by Joe.

  • Kathleen Kelly’s Townhome: 328 W 89th St. (Manhattan)
  • Fox Books: 115 7th Ave. (Manhattan)
  • The Shop Around the Corner: 106 W 69th St. (Manhattan)
  • Cafe Lalo: 201 W 83rd St. (Manhattan)

Moonstruck (1987)

Courtesy of IMDB.

This film gave us the romance we didn’t know we needed between Loretta Castorini, played by Cher, and her fiancé’s brother, Ronny Cammareri, played by Nicolas Cage. After an initial meeting that was the least bit eloquent, Loretta’s fiancé becomes an outlier in her love life.

  • Castorini Townhouse: 19 Cranberry Street (Brooklyn)
  • Cammareri Bros Bakery: 502 Henry St. (Brooklyn)
  • Grand Ticino: 284 W 12th St. (Manhattan)

When Harry Met Sally (1989)

Courtesy of IMDB.

No relationship screams “it’s complicated” like the one between Harry Burns, portrayed by Billy Crystal, and Sally Albright, portrayed by Meg Ryan. The pair’s romance, or lack thereof, had a rocky start and their coupling was but the least bit predictable outside of the film’s title. Nonetheless, the pair ventured all around New York City in some notable, and others more subtle, locations that a vina must check out!

  • Katz’s Delicatessen: 205 E Houston St. (Manhattan)
  • Jess and Marie’s Townhome: 32 W 89th St. (Manhattan)
  • Washington Square Park: Washington Sq. North & 5th Ave. (Manhattan)

While there are numerous places you and your vina gang can visit, this is just a start! Spice up your 9 to 5 life and live vicariously through some of your favorite characters.

Want to find vinas in NYC to scope out these scenes? Start swiping on the Hey! VINA app right now!

HOW TO TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF IN A NEW RELATIONSHIP

It’s not fun to lose yourself in your relationship. You may not even realize it’s happening, and when it does, it can be too late. Take it from us: It’s IMPORTANT to take time for yourself in a relationship. Let me help you discover how to find ways for much-needed “me” time:

SCHEDULE IT!

Your “me” time needs to literally be penciled into your planner (which you definitely have because planners are the freakin’ best). Treat your “me” time just like you would treat a date with your partner, or a date with your best friend (I mean, you are your own best friend, right?). It is important and you WANT to do it. Even if you feel too tired or lazy that day, you’re GOING.

You ain’t cancelling on yourself, mmkay? And if you live with your partner and don’t want to offend them with your “me” time? First of all, if they’re offended that you want time to yourself, you need to have a serious talk. Having time to yourself is important to reset, recharge, and will actually help you be more present with your partner.

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TALK TO YOUR PARTNER ABOUT IT

Make sure to express that you are not doing it to “escape” anything (or them) and that you simply need some mental space for yourself to do those little things you like— reading, trying a new workout class, binge-watching a show you really want to watch but they’re not into, etc. 

If you are using me time to escape your partner, you may want to consider why and perhaps think about what you want from your relationship. It’s not necessarily a bad thing to want to escape—it just means something is off and you need to sort it out. Think about it, talk to them, and be honest.

I can tell you that my partner needs more “me” time than I do, because he’s a thinker and he needs time to literally just lie around and think. I’m way more active and love quality time even when I need “me” time, which is why I can be terrible for finding “me” time.

What that means is for a while, he DID try to use “me” time to escape me, and I started noticing it. It SUCKED. But when I asked him about it (and poked, and prodded, because that’s how he is) it came out and we had a good conversation where he explained what he needs and why.

I had no idea I was taking “me” time away from him, because he never told me!

But was I offended? NOPE. I was just sad that I was hurting him. I didn’t want to be overbearing!

So now if he wants “me” time, he tells me, and that’s that. It’s actually kind of perfect, because I can either get some work done or have “me” time of my own.

SO:

Talk to your partner. Schedule me time. Put it on the calendar.

LASTLY, WHAT TO DO DURING YOUR “ME” TIME:

Brainstorm activities you like. Literally anything you like doing!

Here are some ideas:

  • Go on a walk or a run by yourself.
  • Do a face mask and have a bath.
  • Try a new hobby.
  • Journal.
  • Do a mini staycation, on your own.
  • Get a manicure or pedicure.
  • Work out by yourself.
  • Call a friend you’ve been meaning to catch up with.
  • Explore a cool street in the city.
  • Go on a hike.
  • Go to a movie or museum.
  • Go shopping (or window shopping).
  • Take a cool online course about something you’re interested in (like photography).
  • Binge watch a Netflix show you’ve been wanting to watch.
  • Watch makeup or skincare tutorials on YouTube.
  • Read a book.
  • Listen to a podcast.
  • Raid your closet and create new outfits.
  • Make a new vina date!

Open up your planner, or your calendar app on your phone, and schedule in your dates with yourself. Choose one activity for each time, set reminders, and you’re set!

Protip: If you make them regular, like every Sunday from 10-11am, it will become part of your routine and it won’t get confusing to deal with for your partner too 🙂

I hope this helps you intentionally take time for yourself in a relationship. Just because you have someone else in your life, it doesn’t mean they have to be the #1 priority every waking minute. Plus, if you remember to take care of yourself, you will be making yourself better for everyone else in your life!

This article was originally posted on FlightandScarlet.com. Want to enjoy a new activity with vinas? Find them here!

HOW TO STOP TALKING TO YOUR EX…FOR GOOD

We get it: One minute, you and your partner are texting every night, sending multiple Snapchats throughout the day, expressing how much you want to spend your lives with each other…and then suddenly, it’s over. The person you spent most of your days speaking with and thinking about is no longer who you can talk to. And let’s be totally honest: it’s extremely hard to not reach out to them.

You now have to think about other ways you can spend your newfound free time or who else will listen to you vent about work. For many, it can be as difficult as not knowing if you will ever find someone else.

But hear it from a vina who’s been there before: You guys broke up for a reason. Any more contact will just hold you back from the extraordinary future that awaits. If you’re not sure how to stop all contact, here are a few tips and tricks:

BLOCK! BLOCK! BLOCK! 

Block your ex on everything: social media, email, and obviously their phone number. If what they have to say to you is really that important, they’ll find you another way to tell you (keep in mind—there was once a time where social media and phones were nonexistent). You might be thinking that you had a totally clean breakup and want to stay friends or that you want them to see you living a great life without them, but listen up: it’s not that easy. Being friends with your ex may be unexpectedly painful, and if you are only living your best life to show off to your ex, are you really living life? Constantly seeing your ex post online will just make them harder to get over. Blocking them is for your well-being and it’ll make such a big difference in your life. Try it for a week and see how it goes. We bet you won’t go back!

WRITE A LETTER (AND DO NOT SEND IT)

Sometimes there are so many things you want to say and ask your ex because you are seeking closure. But at times, talking to your ex may just hurt you more or cause confusion—and you definitely don’t need that stress, vina. Writing a letter allows you to put all your thoughts out there, which is really helpful in figuring out how you feel. Sometimes you had the answers all along—you just had to put it on paper.

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BREAK UP WITH THEIR FRIENDS TOO

If you befriended some of their friends while dating, it’s time to say goodbye. You keeping in contact with them is not fully letting go, and that might even mean bumping into your ex every once in a while at group events or parties. If you are truly looking to move forward and not be tempted to go back to your ex, it’s best to 100% remove yourself from any possible scenario like that.

PUT YOURSELF FIRST

Remember what you deserve and that it’s OK to be selfish when it comes to your mental health. You deserve real love, and if keeping your ex in your life is holding you back from finding that, you have to do what’s best for you.

Just remember you broke up for a reason, so why would you want someone like that in your life?

Most importantly, why dwell on an ex when you could be talking to new vinas instead? Heal that heartache and start swiping!

HOW TO DEAL WITH HEARTBREAK OVER A CELEBRITY CRUSH

Celeb crushes are rough. In my not-so-professional opinion they are much rougher than crushes on people you actually know. There is a consistent tinge of heartbreak right from the get-go, and none of the flirtatious excitement that accompanies admiring someone in your actual life. No matter how hard-core your day dreaming skills are, there is a distant knowledge that you will probably never meet this person in real life, and that they will continue breathing and dating and living without the knowledge that you (their soulmate, obviously) exists. There may also be a bit of resonant guilt about the fact that you probably know a lot about them without having met them, and gloom at the idea that if you do ever meet, you’ll either have to lie or hope that they accept you for the crazy fan that you are. Regardless, there is a tinge of helplessness that accompanies the admiration of a celebrity crush. So, how do you break out of this heartbreak?

1. MAKE A LIST

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Jot down what attracts you to this person: A celebrity crush says a lot about you. Not in that you are an obsessive freak, everyone has celebs that they secretly adore, but in that you are drawn to this person for a reason. As it is with most attraction, you are attracted to things about others that you want for yourself.  What is it that you are needing in your life that this person provides? Can you find it in other ways? Can you look for it in other people? Take this as a learning opportunity!

2. DON’T COMPARE:

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It’s not a good call to obsessively compare people in your life with this person, especially prospective romantic partners: No one is going to be as perfect as your celebrity crush. Why? Because you are only seeing the part of them that they and their PR people are revealing to the world. Everyone has flaws and mannerisms that are not constantly publicized. Fall for the reality and messiness of people, and how they interact with YOU.

3. DON’T CHANGE:

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It can be tempting to try and make yourself more like your celebrity crush’s significant others, whether it be in looks or personality. Making yourself someone else’s type NEVER works. Be yourself, and you will attract similar people for your authenticity. No two people are the same, and no one has a limited type.

4. RIDE IT OUT:

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Sometimes its fun to just kick back and daydream. So, as long as it isn’t limiting you from living in the real world, go for it!
Who is your celeb crushes? Ask your new friends on Hey! VINA and Comment below.