You made your resolutions on December 31 with the temperament that 2019 would be the year you kept them. It’s mid-January, and those promises are long gone. Now what? The sun will still shine tomorrow. Take a deep breath and repeat after me: “This is not the end of the world!” Now repeat until you believe it. Your New Year’s resolution does not define you, girl. You’re still in this. It is just a matter of altering the plan.
Whatever your plans were to transform yourself into you 2.0, if you’ve failed, either the plan wasn’t tailored to you, or you didn’t really want to make the change. If it’s the former, take a step back and re-evaluate the whole plan. Make a list and answer the following questions. The only way you can make this work is if you invest good quality time in the plan.
First remember the most important thing: What is the goal? Write it in bold letters at the top of your journal. Think about what worked and what didn’t, and make a separate list – things like, “I didn’t wake up early enough” or “I didn’t plan my traveling properly” would be things that didn’t work. Things that worked would be, “I felt so much better 2-3 days in” or “I could control my feeling more.” Build yourself up on this side of the list. You deserve all the praise you give yourself. You’ve done well up until now—give yourself the credit.
Think of ways to make what didn’t work better or more tangible and realistic. Let’s say you did not fraction in how tired you would be after work; fix it by figuring out what tires you out during the day. Perhaps it is emotional fatigue, or maybe you are crashing after too much coffee or sugar.
Another way to go about it could be to change the wording of the goal. Your mind has already figured out that you did not stick to your resolution once. It will be a lot harder to convince yourself that you can obtain the same goal again. If you change the words, you can trick your mind into thinking it’s a different goal.
As a general rule while you try to get back on the saddle, set realistic targets. There’s no point in setting a goal to lose 10 pounds in a week if you know working out five times a week is an unrealistic target. Be practical and set expectations that you know are within your reach.
If you broke your promise to yourself because you weren’t committed to it in the first place, these are a couple of questions to ask yourself:
- What would you gain and what would you lose by not completing the task?
- Who would be the most disappointed that you didn’t complete it?
- What or who was the real reason you set the goal in the first place?
- In what ways will achieving the goal better your life?
If you find that you answered any of those questions with someone else in mind, whether it’s an actual person in your life or for a future someone (read: SO), you don’t really want it and should be shifting your vision from other people to yourself. Remember every dream can be made into a reality if you just set out a practical plan with steps to getting there. And most of all, just keep going. If you missed a day, don’t beat yourself up about it.
Good luck, stay focused, hopeful and believe in yourself.
In a rut? Try connecting with other vinas on the Hey! VINA app to keep you accountable and well on your way to reaching those resolutions!
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