OPEN UP LIKE NEVER BEFORE — THE VINA GUIDE TO 21 QUESTIONS

When it comes to conversation, I’m like a deep-sea diver exploring the vast expanse of imagination, emotion and psychology within every person I meet. Small talk is its own art — a healthy every day practice which strengthens the fabric of society and has its place and time (i.e. while talking to an acquaintance or meeting someone for the first time, in business while networking or during a sale). Delving into more personal subject matter is required to reach a more profound understanding of another person. Shared vulnerability is quite exciting and those of us who are introverted but crave meaningful connections may be prone to awkward eagerness.

The following list of 21 quirky questions can both break the ice and jump-start a remarkable, lively discussion:

1. What is your favorite childhood memory?
2. Have you ever had a spot that felt like it was ‘yours’ where you could retreat to be alone with your thoughts?
3. If you could build an ideal home what would it look like and where would it be located?
4. When adults asked you what you wanted to be when you grew up, what did you say? *Follow up: what is your idea of a ‘dream job’ now?
5. If you could take on the personality and lifestyle of a fictional character for a week, who would you choose?
6. If you could go back in time to give yourself a piece of advice, what time would you go back to and what would you say?
7. Let’s say your life was a story; who would you hope was the writer or narrator?
8. If you could erase one unfair critique, one insult, or one cruel comment from your memory what would that be and who was responsible for it?
9. What is one challenge that you’ve overcome that you’re really proud of, but not a lot of people know about?
10. If you had to give a TED talk tomorrow what would it be on? 
11. Is there one song in particular that you feel like you’ve listened to more than any other song and how does that song make you feel?
12. What is one skill that you’ve secretly always coveted but you’ve never had the chance to develop?
13. What is your least favorite idiom or colloquial saying?
14. Have you ever cried during a commercial? What was the last one that really ‘got you’?
15. Let’s say you’re actually an alien from another dimension or planet and so far you’ve had amnesia. Now your alien comrades finally come for you – who are they and what is their civilization like?
16. If you met a sexy robot, would you date the advanced AI?
17. If you could only have one superpower, what would it be and what would be the first thing you would do to test it out?
18. What are the top three simple pleasures for you?
19. If you could have an hour long conversation with anyone from the past, who would it be?
20. What are the top 5 things on your bucket list?
21. Do you think we discover the meaning of life or create it?

As you grow closer to your vina over the course of several meet-ups and hangouts it will become much easier for you to communicate without calculation. I hope these questions inspire fun, genuine and original dialogues and best friendships bloom! If you have your own unique favorite conversation starter, please share it in the comment section below.

Use these 21 questions to connect with a new vina today!