When it comes to friendship advice, there’s no doubt that the ultimate queen bee Beyoncé has a few tips to share.
Mrs. Carter, in all of her iterations, has played a big role in my life. My first concert was Destiny’s Child, I was 12 years old and Beyoncé was, in my opinion, at the helm of the fledgling body positivity movement (this was the early 2000s). Seeing her in all her glory singing her butt off (actually correction: her butt was most definitely on and she was shaking it, proudly!) really cemented my standom.
So when Beyoncé famously told InStyle Magazine in a 2011 interview that: “I am a girl’s girl. Women who don’t have female friends scare me…”, I was shooketh to my core, people! That snippet definitely left a lasting impression on me, and for years in the back of my mind, I worried that I was the type of woman Beyoncé lamented about; that I didn’t have enough meaningful, strong, female-relationships (especially after a few moves to new cities where I knew no-one).
Enter the Hey! VINA world, where meeting like-minded (or not so like-minded) ladies is easy, fun, and totally convenient!
So, let’s take some tips from Queen Bey herself and her #girlgang, Destiny’s Child.
Vina, you got a ditto! Awesome— there’s a vina out there who thinks you are super cool and wants to get to know you! Listen, I know it can feel a bit scary or awkward, but set up your coffee date already! Our amazing CEO Olivia already broke the ice for you, so just dive right in and suggest your favorite coffee shop (or wine bar, or restaurant, or rock climbing gym… whatever!) for your first vina date. B would be totally fine with making the plans, so follow her lead!
- DON’T BE AFRAID OF A LITTLE #LADYBRAG – “All the women, who are independent / Throw your hands up at me” – Independent Women, Part I, Destiny’s Child
This lyric from Independent Women Part 1 is pure #ladybrag gold, and reminds us to empower one another. What are you proud of that you’ve accomplished lately? Maybe you aced a test, got a promotion at work, lost 3 pounds, or just didn’t hit snooze on the alarm this morning. Share what you are proud of with your vina and encourage them to do the same. Who knows, you may find that you have similar goals that you can bond over! When we practice a little #ladybrag, we learn to encourage and challenge one another, and can accomplish great things. So don’t be afraid of a little (or a lot) of #ladybrag while you pat yourselves on the back.
- BE YOU – “I don’t think you ready for this jelly / I don’t think you ready for this jelly / I don’t think you ready for this / ‘Cause my body too bootylicious for you babe” –Bootylicious, Destiny’s Child
Vinas come in all shapes and sizes, which is something to celebrate! Rather than try and fit the (size 2) mold, Beyoncé and Destiny’s Child broke the mold by releasing “Bootylicious” and celebrating the jiggle of the JELLY. Follow suit, and challenge yourself and your vina to break the beauty standard mold. Embrace your stretch marks, your scars, your weight, and size—and do the same for others.
- DON’T BE AFRAID TO BE VULNERABLE – “Girl, I can tell you been crying / And you needing someone to talk to” – Girl, Destiny’s Child
“Girl,” released on Destiny Fulfilled album, is basically an ode to friendship. Sometimes you need to ask a friend to be honest and vulnerable with you, and then other times, the best thing you can do as a friend is just listen. Either way, approach your vina with love and support, and let them know that you’re there for them!
- WORK IT, VINAS! – “Girls, we run this motha” – Run the World (Girls) – Beyoncé
Yes, #vinagang we run this motha! #girlgang #squadgirls #ladybrag all day, everyday. VINA not only allows you to build one-on-one connections, but also to connect with a network of bosses with the same goal: run the world, inspire, empower, and uplift others, and have fun doing it! Vinas are more than just someone to get a coffee or a drink with, they are collaborative and creative, just like you.
- BIG-UP YOUR VINA – “I woke up like this / We flawless, ladies tell ’em” – Flawless, Beyoncé
Yes, honey you are flawless! Embrace your weirdness, your awkwardness, your features, your “flaws” because all of the small things that you are self-conscious or insecure about add up to make the beautiful masterpiece that is you! By accepting and loving yourself, you’ll be a better friend to a vina who may need some uplifting as well.
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