You got a match!! And now you’re feeling shy. How do you start a conversation with someone you hope will be your new bestie?
A good intro expresses enthusiasm for the person you’re talking to (it’s flattering to be noticed!) and offers her an easy entrance into the conversation. Simple, straightforward questions combined with a friendly welcome will make your vina want to respond- think of it as digital hospitality. Feeling stuck? Here are some suggestions to get you started:
1. LEAN ON VINA
“Hi Anna, I’m excited to meet you! What do you think of the VINA app so far?”
What’s one thing you have in common? You’re both on the app! Start with your common experience and move from there.
2. FIND COMMON GROUND
“Hey Stephanie, how’s it going? I am stoked to see that you like art museums…I’m such a fan. What’s your favorite around here?”
Open the conversation, point out something you have in common based on your VINA profiles, and ask an easy, relevant question. Whether it’s The Bachelor, whiskey, DIY…everyone love vinas who share their passions.
3. TELL HER SOMETHING THAT’S NOT ON YOUR PROFILE
“Hi Jasmyn, I’m so happy we matched! Are you enjoying the winter thaw? I’ve been dusting off my running shoes – it feels so good to get outside!”
Again, give her a clear way to start her response – “Yeah, the weather’s great! I took a super long walk yesterday and was barely even cold…” Then, don’t be afraid to guide the conversation toward meeting up or finding more things you have in common.
4. ASK ABOUT HER
“Hi Amanda! It’s nice to meet you 🙂 I noticed you work in marketing – can I ask where? I’m doing some design work for an advertising agency right now!”
This might be a good tactic if you’re interested in networking, or if you’re just not sure how to establish a strong connection with your vina right away. Be careful not to answer your own question, though – leave space for her to ask you the same thing back and keep the conversation flowing.
5. CUT TO THE CHASE
“Hi Robin, can’t wait to meet you! Would you be up for coffee sometime next week?”
If you’re confident about this, and especially if your match seems like a planner, ask to meet straight up! We all know that’s why we’re on the app – and we don’t always have time for chitchat.
Once you get past the initial “Hey!”, don’t be afraid to take initiative and invite your vina out! I usually try to suggest a date within the first three or four messages – not only does it prevent the conversation from fizzling, but it keeps the enthusiasm and adrenaline going. Don’t have the app? Download it in the app store to get started finding vinas near you. Good luck!