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DATING HORRORS THAT BOND US

I got 99 problems but dating ain’t one… it’s all of them!

I got 99 problems but dating ain’t one…it’s all of them! So much so, the word dating becomes synonymous with horror after so many awkward meet ups, cringe-worthy conversations and social media confusion that introduces even more horrific experiences to deal with in the dating world than ever before.

One of the most truly terrifying dating scenarios is being ghosted. Even worse, telling your friends about the person you’re dating only to have them disappear altogether and having to explain to those same friends your new interest must be some sort of spy, because they’re completely uncontactable and unable to be seen ever again.

After googling the term ghosting, turns out it happens a lot! Countless articles and personal stories reveal many people have suffered the same fate of liking someone only to have them never respond to a message and never explain why.

Like the Bermuda triangle and how the pyramids were built, what happened to that person you were dating will remain one of the biggest mysteries in the world. Or maybe it’s a conspiracy??

You could put on a monocle and contrive a great 1920s detective accent to figure it out or move on and take solace in the fact it happens to many people.

Why does it happen though? Perhaps because of the modern dating era in which there are way too many platforms to communicate and way too many people you can communicate with thanks to dating apps. Swipe, swipe, swipe and suddenly there’s dates lined up left, right and centre. A conversation with one person ceases a conversation with another and when you’re finally talking to someone you actually like and have exchanged numbers, Snapchat and Instagram handles as well as added them on Facebook, the many methods of communication become all too overwhelming. Do you send a funny video or text a cheeky reply with a salsa dancing girl emoji or tag them in a meme or post a photo of you both with #relationshipgoals? The funniest thing about it all is how many frivolous questions social media and electronic means of communication have created. If you really want a laugh in the dating world, tell someone you’ll call them instead, it’s guaranteed to freak someone out for sure.

Say you finally figured out your method of communication and you’re going on a date. Some dates are wonderful and leave you wanting more. Others (like the many I’ve been on) are cringe-worthy to say the least. There was the time a date never asked any questions about me but instead forced me to listen to an awful rap song they had uploaded on YouTube, also the time I was suspicious my date had smoked some illegal substances before meeting up and the many times with various dates where conversations had ended up in prolonged silences leaving me to stare around the room or sip my drink constantly until someone mentioned the weather.

So why keep dating when there’s so many bad stories to tell? I guess having also experienced the great things about dating (like the excitement of meeting someone interesting and with the same sense of humor) becomes enough to keep wading through all the awkwardness. Yes, I’ve been ghosted, confused as to which social media platform to talk to my date on and ran away from countless bad dates, but these stories all end up being discussed and laughed over a glass of wine with friends who know the same dating trials and triumphs themselves.

End of story, bad dates bring us together as women. So grab a glass of vino with your vina and dish!! Or, pour one out in the comments!

 

4 comments on “DATING HORRORS THAT BOND US

  1. Pingback: DATING HORRORS THAT BOND US – Kiến Thức Cần Biết

  2. Does any one feel the same about when it comes to the person your in a relationship with is liking another girls pictures. It wouldn’t bother me at all if she was famous or had a good amount of followers but she only has 300 maybe the most but every picture she has posted he likes and one video that he likes of her too I wouldn’t care if this was a while ago but it’s been only in these past couple of weeks and it bothers me so bad. I’ve been told get over it he likes her pictures but that doesn’t mean he wants to be with her. But he drops small hints saying how he wants me to dress up more and wear makeup more often and that he likes big breadt which I clearly do not have and it just bothers me because I know this girls has all of that and he likes her pictures not just one and it wasn’t in the past it was recent. I found all this on Twitter and I was just being nosy and spying on him that’s the type of girl I am 😌 everything was fine until I started looking at his likes and then that’s what I find it disappoints me and hurts me at the same time because I know I don’t have what that girl has and I know that’s what he wants. I want to talk to him about it but we’ve had this conversation of me telling him I don’t think I’m good enough for him and he says that’ll only push us apart if you keep thinking that but then I see things like him liking other girls pictures and it destroyed my confidence again I want to tell him but I also don’t want him to be like wow she’s a big stalker and that I feel that I’m not good enough again. Has anyone else gone through this because right now I feel like I’m alone and I don’t have anyone to talk to about this can someone share some wisdom with me please.

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    • Hey Gia, isn’t it funny that about 5 years ago a boyfriend liking photos online of another woman wouldn’t have been a problem. But now it definitely seems to be a problem as social media becomes more and more prevalent. Perhaps 5 years ago this wouldn’t have been your boyfriend liking someone’s photos online but instead, looking at women when you’re out with him and then he comments on their appearance.

      Which makes me wonder if it’s more about the comparisons rather than liking photos on Instagram. A friend of mine had a similar issue where an ex-boyfriend constantly said things like “I like girls with big breasts,” (which she also did not have) and “I like curves” (whereas my friend is naturally quite slim). She talked about how much it hurt her to hear those things and couldn’t help but compare herself to other women. Now she thinks this guy in her life wasn’t worth the time and is glad he’s an ex and has moved on to someone who never compares her.

      It’s important to say how you feel in a relationship and communicate openly. I don’t think there’s any harm in discussing it with your boyfriend again if it really hurts you. If you find yourself comparing yourself to others a lot and not just when your boyfriend likes other people’s photos on Instagram, then perhaps that’s something a counselor (online counselors are great if you wouldn’t want to see someone in person) can talk to you about.

      Just know, everyone compares themselves to others. I’ve done it many times and still do it frequently. Sometimes it’s good to take a break from social media. Maybe try deleting it for a time or even turning off notifications.

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  3. If someone interesting on others then he should start liking the other pictures… you don’t worry about him

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