Celeb crushes are rough. In my not-so-professional opinion they are much rougher than crushes on people you actually know. There is a consistent tinge of heartbreak right from the get-go, and none of the flirtatious excitement that accompanies admiring someone in your actual life. No matter how hard-core your day dreaming skills are, there is a distant knowledge that you will probably never meet this person in real life, and that they will continue breathing and dating and living without the knowledge that you (their soulmate, obviously) exists. There may also be a bit of resonant guilt about the fact that you probably know a lot about them without having met them, and gloom at the idea that if you do ever meet, you’ll either have to lie or hope that they accept you for the crazy fan that you are. Regardless, there is a tinge of helplessness that accompanies the admiration of a celebrity crush. So, how do you break out of this heartbreak?

Jot down what attracts you to this person: A celebrity crush says a lot about you. Not in that you are an obsessive freak, everyone has celebs that they secretly adore, but in that you are drawn to this person for a reason. As it is with most attraction, you are attracted to things about others that you want for yourself.  What is it that you are needing in your life that this person provides? Can you find it in other ways? Can you look for it in other people? Take this as a learning opportunity!

It’s not a good call to obsessively compare people in your life with this person, especially prospective romantic partners: No one is going to be as perfect as your celebrity crush. Why? Because you are only seeing the part of them that they and their PR people are revealing to the world. Everyone has flaws and mannerisms that are not constantly publicized. Fall for the reality and messiness of people, and how they interact with YOU.

It can be tempting to try and make yourself more like your celebrity crush’s significant others, whether it be in looks or personality. Making yourself someone else’s type NEVER works. Be yourself, and you will attract similar people for your authenticity. No two people are the same, and no one has a limited type.

Sometimes its fun to just kick back and daydream. So, as long as it isn’t limiting you from living in the real world, go for it!