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HOW TO GET OVER IT (NO MATTER WHAT ‘IT’ IS)

It's time to move on.

Life has its ups and downs, that is for certain. Most of the time we can roll with the punches, but every now and then we experience something that completely throws us and we just can’t seem to get over it and move on.

Perhaps you were passed over for a promotion, had a falling out with a friend, gone through a breakup, or are disappointed in a family member. Whatever the case may be, it can feel like we are constantly reminded of what happened, and these memories bring up the same intense feelings of hurt, sadness, resentment, guilt, or anger every time. Not only is this emotionally draining and exhausting, this baggage is only weighing you down and limiting your ability to move on with your life and your relationships.

So how does one move on? Here’s a hint…

Ok it’s not quite that simple. According to Life Coach and Author, Christine Hassler, it is impossible to let something go when we continue to judge the situation as being good/bad/fair/unfair etc., by ruminating over how things could have been, or what we or someone else should have said or done. The reality is that you can’t change what happened, and continuing to judge the situation in any way will only keep these feelings alive and impacting your life.

Think about something that happened in the past that bugs you, and notice the judgemental thoughts that come flooding in. Wow, right? Now think about how good it would feel to be able to think about the situation as “just a thing that happened”, without the weight of judgement and its associated negativity.

Hassler explains that the key to letting go of something is acceptance of the situation, which doesn’t mean condoning what happened, rather you just have to remove the judgement and ruminations. Hassler notes that letting go of judgement releases you from the victim mentality, and empowers you to take control and move forward. In doing so, you may even find positive learning experiences in what you’ve been through and acceptance in other situations in your life, which sounds like a win-win!

(Feature image via pintrest)

1 comment

  1. That sounds good…and is in theory the right thing to do, but sometimes, we go through a trauma so great, that it hits us at our core. Being the victim of domestic violence and ending up in the hospital is one of those trauma’s. It takes time to heal, and a good team of friends and therapists. I think you need to be careful that you don’t make it sound that easy. It isn’t always, and especially when you thought that person you loved more than life itself, could do this to you. Warning: if you can’t move on, get help, depression and injury are real. Surround yourself with a support group where you feel loved and accepted. Most of all, somewhere even on the darkest days you are not alone. Blessings to any and all who are going through PTSD.

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