Sisterhood Thrive

FRIEND-JECTION: HOW TO DEAL

Have you ever joined a group conversation and felt like you were the only one who couldn’t contribute to the topic? Or if you chimed in, no one really got what you said and you just ended up feeling awkward?

That happens to me with certain people, and the friend-jection can hit hard.

Being rejected is one of the worst feelings ever. Wouldn’t you rather hear someone tell you “Yes” instead of “No?”

Whether friend-jection is something you’ve dealt with before or is an entirely new concept, here are five ways to not let it get you down:

  1. Don’t take it personally
    There are so many reasons behind the word “No,” and it’s not always because of you personally. Also, you don’t have to ask the reason behind why a friend turned you down. Just accept the friend-jection and move on.
  2. Don’t think about it too much
    Stop obsessing over why a vina canceled your dinner plans tonight. It’s easy to imagine that vina is hanging out with someone else instead, but what good will that do you? If you think about it too much, you’ll just get FOMO.
  3. It’s all about the timing
    Do you ever try to make plans with someone and it never seems to work out? Timing is key. I met a vina and wanted to hang out that week. This vina was only free the following day, so I confirmed our plans. However on the day of our planned outing, the timing didn’t work out because of train delays (ugh) and work schedules, so we ended up rescheduling. But of course I was going out of town, and then I had family visiting, and now it’s the holiday season. So we’ve basically never met in person yet. I’m crossing my fingers that with the new year, we’ll start fresh with what could turn into a beautiful friendship.
  4. Try again
    “If at first you don’t succeed…” You know what I’m getting at here. OK, so you got rejected by a vina once. Don’t sweat it! Try to raincheck the hangout. Go for a better time of day or a type of activity best fit for the both of you. Just don’t be a stranger and ignore your potential new BFF. Just think, if you vinas end up becoming inseparable, you’ll have a funny “how we met” story to tell.
  5. Know when to throw in the towel
    As positive as you may be, sometimes friend-jection happens for a reason. Maybe that vina just wasn’t meant to be your new pal. That’s totally OK! Sometimes, people just don’t click.

Friend-jection isn’t easy, whether it’s coming from a new friend or an old one. But you’re not alone and there are a bunch of other vinas out there waiting to meet you. So what are you waiting for? Get to swipin’!

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