You got the app, took the quizzes, and now matched with a vina who is like your sister from another mister. Congrats, vina!
You set a vina date. Let’s say it’s coffee because you both share a serious love of a well-made espresso. You take a brisk walk there and get situated at an open table with some Joan Baez playing in the background. Your new vina joins you. You blink and think: “NOW WHAT?”
What do you say to someone at first meet? More importantly, how do you break the ice and get that friendship flowin’ like vinyasa?
Never fear! We have instant connection to a science with these helpful tips:
1. BE THE BIGGER DORK
If you sense that she feels nervous or uncomfortable, take it upon yourself to be the bigger dork. Let yourself be as awkward as you might feel. Be you, and don’t try to cool-guy it. Just let your freak flag flap in the wind. Before you know it, the both of you will be laughing and very much over it.
2. ASK PINBALL QUESTIONS
Just ask. Start basic and move on from there. Research at Harvard designed a study that made people fall in love through asking 50 select questions. In some cases, those 50 questions did lead to a connection. Overall, it fostered intimate friendships because we don’t talk about the real things often enough. Who knows? You might be four questions in and sharing real details about your childhood.
3. TALK ABOUT SOME COMMON GROUND
This is a great move for starting things out. There is a reason that you matched in the first place. What was one of the things that made you believe this was a good idea? Go there. Not everyone feels comfortable talking about themselves right away, but most feel confident in things that they know and love. Do the both of you enjoy reading? Practice yoga? Travel for work? Compete in fencing tournaments? Whatever it is, allow that to be your island for now.
4. LAST BUT NOT LEAST: COMPLIMENT THEM
This can be used right away or pulled out of the back pocket if your conversation stalls out. A compliment is a great gateway into a conversation. Follow it up with a question connected with your compliment. Example: I love your haircut. I am looking for a new place. Where do you get your hair done? Trust us, most people love a good compliment, and it’s a good skill to have.
What is your tried-and-true vina date ice breaker? Let us know – sharing is caring.
(Featured image via always-classy-and-sassy.tumblr.com)