Making new friends is great. It’s kind of why we’re all here right now.
Introducing your new vina to your friend group is next level great but an entirely different process altogether. It’s sort of the last uncharted territory like meeting the family when dating.
Meeting women who already know each other with inside jokes and a history of memories is nothing short of intimidating. When you’re the one bringing a newbie into the tribe, it’s sort of your job to orchestrate the whole thing. Make her feel extra welcome, like “Hey, you can totally sit with us.”
INTROS ARE NECESSARY
Take a moment to make sure that she meets everyone: eye contact, names, hugs, the whole bit. A good intro can set an easy tone for the whole interaction.
You want to make it easy on everyone to get to know each other, so avoid movies or super loud concerts, even house parties with an overwhelming amount of people. Instead, pick a good vibe restaurant and a few close vinas. Maybe go to a park and pack some wine or have a get together at your place.
GIVE YOUR FRIENDS A HEADS UP
Clue your friends in ahead of time. If they know you are bringing someone, they will be just as excited to meet her as you were. Give them a chance to bring their A game, and you’ll be impressed by how amazing your network of friends are.
Keep in mind that your new vina doesn’t know the backstory, wasn’t there on that trip, and hasn’t met so-and-so. A quick reference now and then is essential, so she can catch up to speed. This little courtesy will make her feel included and help her get to know everyone.
EVERYONE HAS DIFFERENT SPEEDS
You can’t expect everyone to open up right away. Some people take a few events or interactions, even different social settings, to get in their groove with new people. Don’t write off a new friend because she didn’t instantly blossom amongst your people.
LET HER FLY
If you’ve done these things well, your new vina will be having her own conversations, laughing with someone else, or be opening the next bottle of wine. When this happens, let it roll. As soon as you can sense her comfort level reach a good place, let her do her own thing.
(Featured image by @lenamirisola)